Want your teenager to start doing more chores? Good idea.
Studies show that requiring teens to pitch in around the house and community for the benefit of the greater good has all kinds of positive benefits.
But, of course, it isn’t so easy to actually convince your teen to take on more responsibility. What’s the answer?
Dr. G, author of Get the Behavior You Want Without Being the Parent You Hate, is a national expert on raising responsible, respectful kids.
In this podcast episode she talks at length about how to instill responsibility and a strong work ethic in teenagers. She reveals how, exactly, you should ask teens to do their chores, what you should do about allowance, tips on getting teens into volunteer work, and much more.
Re-Thinking the Definition of Chores
An important question is: what chores should your teen even be doing? Cleaning their room? Doing their own laundry?
Actually, no. These aren’t even true chores. Yes, your teen should, of course, be doing all of these things.
But chores, Dr. G explains, must be things that teens do for the greater good, not just for themselves. This means cooking dinner for the family, washing everyone’s laundry, cleaning out the stable, doing the family grocery shopping, etc.
And how much of this stuff should you expect your teen to do? Probably more than you think. Dr. G has found that teens need to be doing chores every single day…
And as an example of how to use these techniques with your own teenager, I put together a word-for-word script for you to get through to your teen FAST about any issue.
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2 Quotes from
9 Clips from
CLIP 1 (1:33)
How Two Patients Made Dr. G Want to Study Parenting
Two patients, one with debilitating MS and the other with simple back pain, led Dr. G to become a parenting expert.
CLIP 2 (2:58)
Your Teen’s Happiness is NOT a Measure of Your Parenting
When our kids aren’t happy we can feel like we must be doing something wrong as a parent, but this is a damaging belief.
CLIP 3 (1:34)
The Benefits of Doing More Chores
Studies show some very positive benefits to requiring more of teens. Dr. G explains the research in this mini clip.
CLIP 4 (3:11)
What Chores Should Teenagers be Expected to Do?
Most parents assign chores that are too easy. Here, Dr. G discusses the importance challenging chores for teens.
CLIP 5 (1:34)
What to do When Your Teen Asks for a New Privilege
When your teen wants a new privilege and your gut reaction is that he or she isn’t ready yet, what should you do?
CLIP 6 (3:33)
When Your Teen Wants to Quit Something, do This:
If your teen wants to quit band or quit the sports team or quit the drama club, how should you handle it?
CLIP 7 (1:03)
How to Build a Good Work Ethic in Your Teen
Dr. G has discovered it’s simple to teach work ethic. It starts with teaching teens to say two phrases.
CLIP 8 (3:01)
Empowering Teens to Make a Positive Difference in the World
Sure, volunteering sounds great, but how do you get teens interested? Dr. G explains how in this clip.
CLIP 9 (2:00)
Urging Teens to Use their Skills for the Greater Good
The key is to focus on a talent or ability that your teen already enjoys and spends a lot of time on.
Dr. Deborah Gilboa
Respected parenting and youth development expert, Deborah Gilboa, MD, is the founder of AskDoctorG.com. Popularly known as Dr. G, her passion for raising kids with character makes her a favorite family physician, media personality, author, speaker, and social influencer. A mom of four boys, she inspires audiences with relatable stories and easy tools to develop crucial life skills in children ages 2-22.
Her work with the deaf community has received national recognition and was the focus of her service as an Albert Schweitzer Fellow and she has received multiple awards for clinical excellence in teaching, including the Alpha Omega Alpha Volunteer Clinical Faculty Award as a Clinical Associate Professor for the University of Pittsburgh School Of Medicine.
Dr. G is the author of multiple books including Get the Behavior You Want Without Being the Parent You Hate! (Demos Publishing) and parenting activity books focusing on building her 3R’s of Parenting: Respect, Responsibility and Resilience.