Ned Johnson is an elite SAT tutor who specializes in developing self motivation for students who are preparing to take important exams. William Stixrud is a leading neuropsychologist, professor, and expert on the adolescent brain.
Together, they wrote an incredible book called The Self-Driven Child: The Science and Sense of Giving Your Kids More Control Over Their Lives.
This week on the podcast I interviewed Ned and Bill about how parents can help teenagers develop self motivation.
Developing Self Motivation
Ultimately, these experts stress that there are certain areas where most parents should actually be giving teens more freedom and others where most parents already need to be giving less. Bill and Ned break those down and explain how to use “collaborative problem solving” to impose stricter rules.
Also, they reveal how to teach teens things and give teens advice in a way that they will accept. In order to teach teens how to develop self motivation you have to get past their defenses and that requires perfect timing. Learn how to make sure it happens just right.
As an example of how to put this into practice with your own teenager, I developed a word-for-word script you can use for inspiration (or even just memorize). To download it free now, enter your first name and email below. I’ll also show you how to sign up for my free 10-day email course that reveals the secret method behind the word-for-word script. And I’ll even hook you up with a free trial membership to the entire website!
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2 Quotes from
9 Clips from
CLIP 1 (1:22)
Teens are Building their Brain for the Rest of Their Lives
Bill and Ned think that parents’ most important job during the teenage years is to help teens build the best brain possible.
CLIP 2 (1:19)
“I Love You Too Much to Fight with You About Homework”
Homework is an area parents should act like kids’ consultants rather than bosses so they will develop self motivation.
CLIP 3 (1:54)
Limiting Teens’ Access to Technology
Here, Bill and Ned outline a collaborative problem solving approach for limiting technology use with a teenager.
CLIP 4 (2:11)
Why You Should Have ‘Consulting Hours’ with Your Kids
How to establish a system where you are available to help your kids and talk to them during certain hours of the day.
CLIP 5 (3:58)
Secrets for Giving Advice to Teenagers
Use this special autonomy-affirming method to give advice your teens will actually accept and be grateful for.
CLIP 6 (2:07)
The Importance of Having Time to Do Nothing
Studies show that teenagers need time to be alone with their thoughts and wonder about how to make the world better.
CLIP 7 (1:23)
The Epigenetic Effects of Stress on Teenagers
Stress activates epigenetic changes in your teen that forever change how they will process high-stakes situations.
CLIP 8 (1:14)
Why the Teenage Brain is so Incredibly Vulnerable
Teenagers’ brains respond to everything from stress to alcohol in a very extreme way. Here’s why that makes such a big deal.
CLIP 9 (2:51)
Use this Script on Your Teenager
Ned reveals a word-for-word script you can use to get your teen to take on more responsibility around the house.
Ned and Bill
This week, our podcast guest is a duo! William Stixrud and Ned Johnson are the authors of The Self-Driven Child: The Science and Sense of Giving Your Kids More Control Over Their Lives.
Ned is the founder of PrepMatters, a tutoring service in Washing DC, and the co-author of Conquering the SAT: How Parents Can Help Teens Overcome the Pressure and Succeed.
A sought-after speaker and teen coach for study skills, parent-teen dynamics, and anxiety management, his work has been featured on NPR, NewsHour, U.S. News & World Report, Time, The Washington Post, and The Wall Street Journal.
William is a clinical neuropsychologist at The Stixrud Group and a faculty member at Children’s National Medical Center and George Washington University Medical School.
He lectures widely on the adolescent brain, meditation, and the effects of stress, sleep deprivation, and technology overload on the brain. He has published several influential scientific articles and is on the board of the David Lynch Foundation.